Life these days....the daily struggle

It's been such a long time since I've blogged.  Life has just been so busy. I've had friends and others that I've seen that have had to deal with similar issues as me and so a lot has been on my mind about it. Writing it all out always helps me too.

Dealing with my own body attacking itself is still very hard to deal with. I try to keep a smile on my face everyday, but most days are up and down. People ask how you are doing and it's a hard question to answer. It's easier just to say "I'm fine" and move on.  Plus it's hard to see from the outside the things that people have to deal with. Most people just don't understand when everything seems great from the outside. Somedays are pretty good and others are not. I'm so thankful to have found Red River Health and Wellness back in April to find more answers and know the things I need to do to help my body. But, still knowing most answers does not make it any easier. It is still a lot to deal with. I struggle daily mentally and physically. Some days are trial and error to help us learn more to see what my body can handle and what it can't. I haven't truly worked out in months. It's the longest I've ever gone without exercising, besides when I was pregnant. It drives me crazy that my body cannot do what it once could. It is too slow of a process for me. I want to be right back to CrossFit or doing my own daily exercise routine. I now need more motivation than ever, I use to be great at motivating myself to get it done everyday. But, now it's not so easy. I can motivate others as  Personal Trainer. :) But, sometimes motivating myself is a whole other issue. That wasn't always the case. It's also very intimidating and scary to try exercising again. I can now start exercising a little, but I have to know how to take it easy, listen to my body and not push too hard. A whole new way for me!

Struggling with Stage 3 Adrenal Fatigue (you may see me refer to stage 7 on a different scale, same thing), Hypoglyecmia, Leaky gut, and food intolerances of Gluten, most other grains, Corn, Dairy, Soy, Eggs, Sugar and chemicals/msg has been enough to deal with on its own. I have come to deal with it besides the breakdowns every now and again that I just want to eat what I want to eat without thinking about it and without feeling completely sick, nauseous, severe fatigue, heart palpitations, can't breathe, dizziness, migraine headaches, blurry vision, sores that come on my skin, hormonal issues, irritability and more. Feeling the symptoms every time we try to add a food in makes it all worth it again for me to stick to it better than ever. It's not worth it anymore to waiver at all. Some foods cause the symptoms to stay non-stop for 1 to 2 weeks at a time. I've always loved food. I have not always been this strict and diligent believe me. But, the worse my symptoms have gotten over the years and now knowing how to fix it if I just stick with it has started to be my new way of life.

Managing my hypoglycemia goes hand in hand with the other hormonal and introlerance issues. If I don't eat to manage my blood sugar and my insulin spikes up and down all day then it tries to pull from my adrenal glands and there is nothing more there to grab. My immune system is already down and my body cannot break down anymore then it already is. So, we've worked for months and months to rebuild my adrenals and heal my gut. It's a very slow, frustrating and LOOOONNNGG process. It requires patience which I must need to work on. I can now finally have a little bit of honey, pure maple syrup or coconut sugar once in a while. But, if I make something with that I can only have 1 or 2 small servings otherwise it spikes the blood sugar too much. It takes a lot of control on my part which I don't always have. It's a lot to learn and do and takes a lot of management on my part. It's also important to manage my stress which is hard since I have a million things on my plate as most Moms and business owners do. I'm blessed to have jobs that I love, Let's play music teacher, Fitness Director/Personal Trainer, Brain Balance Nutrition Coach and Perfectly Posh Business Owner/Team Leader and also the YW president and my Husband and Family. It's a lot and I have to try learn to slow down everyday before my body breaks down completely. Hoping to slow down here in a couple months.

I've learned a lot from the process and am so blessed to Start working for the Brain Balance Centers in Utah as the Nutrition Coach. Not only do I love helping other families through similar issues, but when I'm helping them it helps me to continue working hard on my part too.

I've learned to rely on my faith in Christ. That is the only thing that helps me through each day. I don't know why somedays I don't trust and have enough faith. Because that is what he is there for. When I trust and rely on Him and stay diligent in what I'm suppose to do my days are always better. I am actually thankful for my struggles as I have found the through trials that we all go through helps us to become more refined and more and more like the person we are suppose to become.

I know many other people out there are struggling. I talk to people weekly, or read books or blog posts about those with almost the same issues as me.  It's so important to know you're not alone and makes it easier to have support from other people too. So, this is my own effort for somebody else who is struggling. So, there's my deep post for the week.. :)

Have a Great Weekend!